Tuesday, April 1, 2008

Should I Change My Vote?

This just in: Barack Obama can't bowl! Reports say he bowled a 31 in Pittsburgh recently. A 31! I mean, I get mopey when I get just barely over 100. Seriously, I've seen small children bowl better than a 31. Someone get this man some bumpers.

Now, I'm no pro, but I'm a modestly serious bowler. I own my own ball and shoes and I have about a 150 average in my league. Can I accept this kind of bowling score out of my commander in chief? What if Osama Bin Laden ever comes out of hiding and says he'll stop the whole terrorism thing if the president can beat him at bowling, I'd like to know that my president could at least put up a phone. Forget the whole "answering the phone at 3am" crap, I want to know my president can roll a strike every once in a while. I like my candidates Lebowski approved.

This better be an April Fool's joke, Mr. Obama.

In all seriousness, though, is this news? It seems like news organizations are treating it as news. Does anyone really care that Obama's a crappy bowler? Probably, but that's just asinine. GW Bush is a pretty decent athlete, and he's been just an awful president. Nixon was an avid bowler. How'd that turn out? FDR was in a wheelchair, and he won World War II. I guess what I'm saying is this: If a president is devoting too much time to athletics and recreation, he's probably doing a lousy job running the country.

Cheers,
Eli

Crosswords-
NYT- 9:13 (hard for a Tuesday, and others agree)
CS- 6:07
LAT- 8:04
NYS- 9:58
Y!- 7:35

1 comment:

  1. Technically--and I'm just being a smartass here--FDR didn't *win* WWII.

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