Get thee to a Hamburgerery!

Get thee to a Hamburgerery!
Originally uploaded by EliCubs

My new office is across the street from the Hamburger Hamlet. I haven't eaten there yet, but I'm told it's nice. What strikes me is the sign.

Now, I don't know this for sure, but I'm guessing that they originally intended the "village without a church of its own" definition of the word "Hamlet." Now, however, based on the sign with the comedy and tragedy masks, they appear to have switched to the "brilliant, violent tragedy by William Shakespeare" definition. This seems like an odd choice to me. What part of the play Hamlet makes people want to eat hamburgers? Is it the ear poison? The regicide? The moss and flower symbolism? Please tell me.

Do the waiters here soliloquize about the virtues of murder and suicide instead of reading you the specials? Are you allowed to put poison on the tip of your steak knife and get into a fencing knife with your girlfriend's brother at the table? Can you have two of your friends sent off by pirates to be executed in England, hoisted by their own petard, as it were? Is the maitre'd a doddering old man who spouts proverbs and gets stabbed behind curtains?

And finally, at that breakfast on the sign, do you think they serve Melancholy Danishes?

Thank you folks, you've been wonderful. Good night!