Thursday, July 12, 2007

Is it safe? Is it safe?

I went to the dentist today. Now, I'm not a big fan of the dentist. I have never had a cavity or anything, so it's a totally irrational fear. I've never been in a great deal of pain in a dentist's office and yet I always feel like "this time's gonna be the time." Well, today seemed like a good candidate. I was in last month for a routine checkup and they said I had too much plaque built up on my gums. So, they wanted me to come in for a "deep gum cleaning." For this, for the first time in my life, I had to be numbed with Novocaine. This is an utterly strange sensation. I didn't really feel anything through the procedure, so that's cool, but then I had to go to work with half of my face numb. I met my boss's wife for the first time with a dead right half of the face. I felt like Two-Face or the Elephant man. Speaking of which, do you think anyone ever considered throwing acid on Two-Face's good half and seeing if that leveled him out a little? I mean, if he's called One-Face maybe he wouldn't be so pissed off all the time. No one likes having to buy two sets of clothes then sew them together into one suit. Of course, you run the risk of turning him into PURE evil instead of half evil, but I think it's a risk Batman should be willing to take. He can't be that much worse, right? Ah well. The Novocaine's worn off and now my mouth just hurts. Thanks, dentist.

Bonus points to anyone who gets the reference in today's title.


  1. Sorry. I gon't get the reference, unless it has to do with the Batman movie where the cosmetics were contaminated.

    I'm proud that you had the nads to go to the dentist in the first place.

  2. That deep gum cleaning thing must be a scam!!! The pulle dthe same thing on me when I went to the dentist. Do you go to Dr. Boudaie in North Hollywood? I think he's just go a ton of that stuff that he bought at like the dentists' Costco and needs to get rid of it.